Say No to Self-Sabotage

Do you feel like your life is stuck? Do you try progressing and often find a stumbling block? Do you feel like someone else could be responsible for your stagnation? Chances are you would want to blame someone else and even claim there are people looking at you with a ‘bad eye.’ But have you thought that you could be the one sabotaging your own progress?

Self-sabotage is when one engages in behaviors that prevent them from achieving their set goals. Such behaviors include but are not limited to:

1. Resisting change

Comfort feels good because it is what you have always known. But as you look around yourself, you realize that you are meant to achieve more, and you desire to have more. However, making the choice to pursuing what you want becomes uncomfortable. You start drawing up several ‘what if’ scenarios of how things could go wrong until you end up throwing away your plans. Remember that these situations are made up in your mind and you could try changing the narrative to ‘what if it works?’

2. You are afraid of attachments

You are most thrilled by the feeling of a fresh start and once it wanes, you are already looking out the next big thrill of your life. If you recognize this pattern, it is time for you to figure out why attachments make you uncomfortable then endeavor to know what a healthy attachment looks like and pursue it.

3. Downplaying your achievements

At times you look forward to achieving a certain goal, but once you get hold of it, you try hiding the achievement. It almost looks like you are trying to be humble, but hey! Learn to celebrate your achievements. It has taken you hard work to get there and you shouldn’t be thinking of whether people will like you or not. Start seeing your achievements as an opportunity to influence and change the lives of others and with time, celebrating your achievements will not only become easy, but will encourage you to pursue bigger goals.

4. You want everything done perfectly

You often bail out of a task whenever you get the slightest idea that it may not turn out perfectly. You do not want to be associated with imperfection. In fact, when you look at others, all you see is their faults, while forgetting that you are not perfect either. You end up setting unrealistic expectations on others thus making them uncomfortable around you. However, try to focus on progress, understand that people make mistakes and not everything can be done right at the first trial. Appreciate growth and soon even those around you will feel at ease being around you.

5. You are disorganized

Disorganization is a form of distraction. It is creating chaos around ourselves to keep us from showing up and stepping up. Your home should have a calming welcoming effect for you. Your office space should also be tidy enough to enable you function efficiently. Decluttering may sound daunting to an already disorganized person, and a clean space may seem too uncomfortable. However, you can begin by working on a corner of your house or office space and ensure that is always organized and with time you will get used to organization as you gradually organize other spaces.